Dear Director;
So for any of you who are familiar with tumblr, you know there are all these “30 days of….” floating around. In which every day for a month you have something you post on your tumblr according to what the list says for that day. I am currently doing 30 days of letters. I wrote the one for Friday early since I kind of wanted to get it over with. It was a letter to your parents. My mom’s was easy, my Jack’s wasn’t fun, and I wrote a 3rd one. It’s to my school director. It really bugs me when people call their friend’s parents their parents, or just random adults they’re close with, but I feel like it would make me feel good to write this. This is my father figure, since only Jack’s pay check has played that role for me. This isn’t just something I’ve consciously decided, but I dream about him playing the father figure in my life and doing the things I wish I had a dad for. I decided, since it’s the longest letter of the three, and since he really isn’t my teacher, I’d post it here, to keep the post down, and since I cried while writing this one more than I did with writing the one about my dad. So here is the letter:
“I’ve only known of you since 7th grade. I was just coming into the school, and wouldn’t have you as a teacher until 8th grade. I heard many stories about you, good, and bad. The first time I was face to face with you was the spring meeting for Fall musical. Everyone cheered when you came in, and honestly, I thought you were a little odd, but you I could tell you knew what you were doing. I didn’t see you again until my first period of 8th grade. I talked to you like I’ve known you way longer than I had. I didn’t go out for musical that year, that would have to wait until next year. But through my whole 8th grade year I talked to you almost every day, teased you, you teased me. Once you even locked me out of your room during a lesson after asking me to demonstrate something. The next year I finally got the courage up to go out for musical. It was Cats. As soon as the slide came up for it on the slideshow, I can honestly say I was about ready to get up and leave. I was NOT doing Cats as my first musical ever. I somehow convinced myself to stick with musical, and grow my bond with the theater, in full body spandex. I talked to you quite regularly during musical. I always felt closer to you than with Mrs. Wilson. For 1. You directed more of the acting, and she did the singing, and I was there for the acting part of it, and 2. Mrs. Wilson didn’t show that she even knew my name until strike that year. I then didn’t really have contact with you again until Spring Play the next spring. Here I learned how close a theater family really can get. I was now back to talking to you daily. We teased each other plenty more, and our bond grew. After closing night, I only saw you once or twice before Musical time this year. I came into this year way more confident, and ready to get working. There was a point when the cast list came out that I was going to drop out. I put hours upon hours of work into my audition, and all I got was ensemble. My heart was broken. I am so glad I didn’t drop out of it. We bonded a lot more this year. One moment I will never forget is sitting at a cafeteria table at strike with you and Mrs. Wilson, having several “1, 2, 3, MARINA!”s, and just having a bunch of fun just sitting there talking with you two. During that time I remember you said, “I learned a lot about you this fall, Marina.” It just felt so heart felt, and I loved it. I luckily didn’t have to wait long until I got to talk to you daily. I think it was…. 3 days? I decided to join one act. That was one fun audition. You know that I can’t do a british accent to save my life, or a Japanese accent, and that all my accents basically sound like a really bad western accent. I had a total of one line in this production, but I think it was my favorite production I have been in so far. There were so many inside jokes that you still tease me about. Towards the end of this season is when I started having the dreams. At first I wasn’t sure what to think of them, but upon looking deeper into them I realized that you were playing the father figure in my life, and my subconscious was trying to show me that. Subsections was amazing, even though we broke a 10 year streak of winning subs. Sitting in our class room having you read “Happy moments” from my cosmo girl mini book. Which led to a lot of “That’s a HAPPY moment?” and, “Uh…. I’m not reading that.” When we went to go watch State was even more amazing. Talking shows with you, and watching your facial expressions during them was priceless. We had a long conversation on the way back on the way back about being in a show that was about teenagers in our time, and different props some of the shows used, me not knowing that you where using me to pick the Spring play. Spring play was amazing once it came. I got the biggest part I’ve had yet. You told someone that my role was “made for me.” You’re my favorite grown up male by far. I hope you continue to me a role model in my life for years to come.
-Marina”
So I know that that was written really poorly, and has no paragraphs in it what so ever, but it was just me poring my heart out.
Thanks for reading if you actually read all the way through. I just needed to tell someone out there how I felt about this man I look up to.
p.s. the photo that is featured at the top of this post is me and him in Spring of ’09
The Words Blew in. 